Ozlilly's musings...

There was a thunderstorm with heavy lightning. I heard the heavy rain start when I was in the bathroom. We prayed together at six-thirty.

We are discussing the contents of the HDH that we read, and both of us pay particular attention to the content. We discuss the time that the speeches were given, who they were given to and whether it was Father or Mother Moon.
This morning after Josef left and I ran the virus scan, I decided to have some breakfast. This is not a typical thing for me. Often, I make myself a shake. In fact, my morning routine beyond the shower, prayer and cycling is not so rigid. It also varies according to whether Josef is home, or I am alone.
I am acutely aware about how I still feel I need to “catch up” with the “me-time”. I could of course watch TV and iron. There is enough ironing to do. I am aware of a certain paradigm within me that knows that my mother used to watch the Danny Thomas Show, It could be You, and do the ironing.
I ended up watching Matlock. Do you know Matlock? I’ve never seen it before. It looked like Andy Griffith and sure enough it was. I used to watch the Andy Griffith Show when I was a kid. So it seems this programme is also out of the 1960’s.
I became aware of something I once read from Young Oon Kim. She advised us to just allow our thoughts to roam; when we try to meditate and pray, to not fight the opposing thoughts, but just observe them and allow them to pass. Of course, now-a-days, with all the mindfulness training, a lot of people already know this technique. Don’t fight your negative thoughts. Just acknowledge them, observe them, and let them pass. If you give them energy, they get stronger.
The Principle tells us not to have any give and take with Satan. It is not modern to use such language but that’s how it was in the 1970’s when I joined the Unification Church.
I thought I would get to write my blog today. I wanted to give you the references to the meetings I attended last week. I made a few references in my vlog and determined to keep up the routine to blog and vlog each week.
As I started saying before, I feel like I am still playing “catch-up”.
So I had a perceived luxurious breakfast. I took a photo. It was rock melon and then three crispbreads and a cappuccino. I had Philadelphia cheese with half a banana on one and thought of my mother. I had ham, cheese and radish on the second. Then I put crunchy peanut butter and Nutella on the third.
That’s when I turned the TV on. I thought I might watch Soko Kitzbuehel which Josef watched last night while I was in the UPF meeting. Then I just wanted to check the available programmes to see whether perhaps there’s a Navy CIS playing somewhere with an episode I have not seen. I already knew that the current ones playing on ATV and Puls4 are shows I have already seen. I am so grateful for that programme app.
Wow, my mind still goes all over the place at a hundred miles an hour. I think of all the things I have written about and want to write about and think I’d like to start a database for my blog. I am such a data freak! I just love my access data bases! And to think that I didn’t get the job at the Japanese mission because I was not good enough! So funny. Yet so telling. These are the life lessons. It was that experience in 1999 that led me to take a real interest in Access. Actually I was already into databases and pc programs in the 1980’s in Australia, in Canberra and Melbourne when we started with our first computers.
So, my lesson today: make that schedule and check it daily. Do the “To do List”.
Since I sat watching Andy Griffith until 12, I missed the Quantum Leap call with Vivienne. Luckily, there is a replay. It is better however to be there live. I acknowledge that it is important to “show yourself”, to engage, to participate if you want to accomplish anything.
My issue? I still don’t know what I really want to accomplish. And this morning Daniela affirmed me in my speaking. As I told her my thoughts and experiences, she said she is not a speaker and I am a good speaker. She really appreciates what I say, and I believe we are really great buddies! She is young, vibrant and ambitious. I am experienced, wise and articulate. I have a lot to share and I just love to listen as well as to tell my stories. That’s what I’m doing here. There were about ten stories started in this entry!
I am so aware of those x-generation, millennials and other youngsters who don’t even know what it was like to grow up without a mobile phone and a computer.
This Andy Griffith show I just spent the morning watching, took me back, yes, half a century, into another world. The next program was Texas Ranger with Chuck Norris! I never watched that stuff! Yet I know the sayings and sure, lots of my peers and colleagues were probably hooked on that stuff. Like MacGyver. I know the old shows and sometimes see bits of the new one and don’t even feel tempted to watch.
Yes, it’s the addiction potential I am addressing now. I enjoyed watching the show: Matlock and then there was a second and a third episode. Then a couple of hours had passed. On Nitro TV there are ads only every hour, not three times an hour like on ATV and Puls4. So I had to be sure to get up and walk my 250 steps each hour. Once I warmed up some more milk to add to my second cup of coffee with some Nesquik. I’m still putting gelatine in my coffee for my joints. I do believe I still need it. My two artificial knee joints are no guarantee for the rest of my musculoskeletal system and since I’ve felt a bit of pain in my ankle it’s clear I need to remain vigilant.
Vigilance. Yes vigilance! We need to keep vigilant. What do we do with our time? Where do we invest our resources? Where am I allowing myself to get addicted? Where are my thoughts going? Where has all the time gone?
It really feels like time is going so much faster now. I’ve been retired for two years already, and I have not felt at all like I am bored or have nothing to do. On the contrary: I still see all my projects before me and sometimes even get a sense of urgency, that I have not scanned all my photos, or catalogued all my videos; all the while still taking more photos and making more recordings!
So, clearly, one of my next lessons needs to be about digital de-cluttering and minimalism.
Do you notice all these things too? Or am I your alarm or wake-up call? Or do I bore or entertain you? You know actually I love philosophizing and as much as I enjoy expressing myself in writing, I enjoy even more a lively discussion over a cup of coffee. But then, I’ve noticed, I’ll often sit back and just listen before I interrupt somebody else talking. Even if I disagree or have something completely different to say. Hence my reference to make yourself seen and heard. It is my issue. I think I need to speak up. Well at least I am showing myself here. Though, we all know how deceptive the internet can be.